This just in..Breaking News

Breaking News

A major enquiry has started this evening, after Dance Armpong crashed during the first stage of the Vuelta de Castle and Lion. The enquiry seems to be centred on why one of the multitude of journalists, photographers, well wishers, hangers-on, dope testers, that are normally stuck up his XXXX, did not dive to the floor in front of the multiple pile up, to break his fall.

” I just dont get it..” said Prance from his hospital bed.” I would have expected at least one of them to have broken my fall. Actually I am a bit disappointed that Bertie ContaDoper didnt sacrifice his chances in July and offer me a soft landing….Why didnt they all get out of my way, dont they know who I am?………. Oi Levi could you top up this drink for me….”

We found Bertie Contadoper polishing the scuffs off Blanch,s saddle…
” I think we can share the team leadership in July and there is no contest.. Jahan said all that smoke being blown up Branches AHole by the cycling press probably blinded him…”

” its not my fault that yankee has forgotten how to ride his happy shopper…”
he added softly..

Paul Kimmage was said to be delighted with the outcome of todays stage..


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